Yesterday I found out that my friend and mentor Jan Kristal passed away from breast cancer. Everything I know about temperament I learned from Jan. She was the leader in the field of temperament. I feel blessed to have had her as a friend. Today I came across an article Jan wrote for me years ago when I had the Family Counseling Center in Mill Valley. I was going to write an article on children's temperament and then this showed up tucked away in a desktop file. A gift from Jan. So it is in loving memory that I reprint this article.
My college background taught me that children were a product of their environment and behavioral difficulties were due to the relationship with the primary care givers. Then I had children. Armed with my degree in Child Psychology, I felt prepared to handle whatever came my way. My first daughter was shy, quiet, and easy to reason with and discipline. I was successful because of my knowledge of child psychology and our obviously good attachment. My second daughter was LOUD, a mind of her own. Discipline was a challenge that often became a power struggle. What worked with my older daughter did not work with my second. What was happening? My parenting style was the same/ Our home environment was positive and supportive. What was I doing Wrong? At that time I didn't know that I was dealing with two different temperaments.
What exactly is temperament? Temperament is a child's behavioral style. It is how the child responds to the surrounding world. Temperament consists of the individual differences that make each child unique. The study of temperament is based on the pioneering research of psychiatrists Stella Chess and Alexander Thomas who followed 133 babies for over thirty years from infancy to adulthood. Chess and Thomas noticed some children with behavior problems came form "good" environments and others who were doing well came from seemingly "bad" environments. They were convinced that babies had innate differences that were probably as important as the family's influence in determining behavior. Through their study they identified nine temperament traits: sensitivity, activity level, intensity of reaction, rythmicity, adaptability, approach/withdrawal, persistence, distractibility, and mood. They also found that about 10-15% of children had "difficult" temperaments.
Chess and Thomas learned that taking into account the child's temperament helped them to make more specific treatment strategies. Since each child is different, each child needs a different approach. Temperament does not determine behavior alone, just as the environment is not the sole cause. Rather, it is the interaction of environment and temperament that determines behavior. This important interaction is known as "Goodness or Poorness of Fit". The way in which a child's temperament "fits" with the environment is important in healthy adjustment. Expecting an active child to sit quietly through a long, formal dinner is an example of "poor fit". A child who is uncomfortable and withdrawing in new situations will experience "poor fit" and become anxious and more withdrawn if constantly forced to "get in there and swim or sink". A child who has difficulty shifting gears will do well when prepared for the transition and allowed a bit more time to make the adjustment, thus a "good fit" has been achieved.
Society tends to discourage differences in individuals. Temperament speaks to these differences. It increases the range of what is considered "normal" behavior. It can also provide ways to improve fit with the environment. In this way, differences are acknowledged and worked with rather than ignored or made into problems.
Understanding a child's temperament at an early age helps parents, teachers or other adults in the child's life, know how to respond to daily behavior in a way that encourages goodness of fit and a healthy relationship. As a child moves from infancy into toddler hood, the preschool years and beyond, temperament determines how the child responds to the world.
Temperament information can be used in a variety of settings. Pediatricians have found temperament information valuable in helping them know how a child will react to a medical procedure and also helps them provide more accurate behavioral advice to parents. Teachers find it helps them understand how children will learn in the classroom and deal with problematic classroom behavior. Therapists use it a s tool in devising more effective treatment strategies. Parents use this information to help them deal with challenging situations. Temperament information provides one more piece of the puzzle that can be used to further understanding of behavior and help form more positive relationships.
parents and professionals who consider temperament as an integral part of each child are able to know how the child will react in certain situations and can then plan ahead to prevent problems. They are able to work with , rather then against the child to determine the most effective strategies, and they welcome the unique individual differences each child brings to an interaction. Understanding temperament won't stop behavior form happening, but it does help manage it more effectively.
You can read more of her work in her book: The Temperament Perspective.
Preventive ounce is a free online resource for parents. An interactive site to discover more about your child's temperament.
http://www.preventiveoz.org/
You can read more of her work in her book: The Temperament Perspective.
Preventive ounce is a free online resource for parents. An interactive site to discover more about your child's temperament.
http://www.preventiveoz.org/
